It's Good To Be In Love
by Fuebi
Summary: It is universally known that the winters in Montreal were tough. Roxas agrees, but wishes that Axel was there to tough it out with him instead of being in Vancouver, living up to the softball sensation he's going to be. AkuRoku. Xmas special.


**Author's Note:**Merry Christmas you guys! This is the sequel to "Rid My Dirty Mind." If some of you haven't guess yet, the name of the fanfic was named after "Rebel Prince" by Rufus Wainwright. This one is named after Frou Frou's "Good To Be In Love." Embrace the Christmasy-love... I guess.

**Warning:** Contains swearing, moody Roxas, being _down_ on Christmas, commercialism, underage drinking, Larxene's french accent, angst, **Canadian**, but surprisingly not enough tongue.

**Disclaimer:**Unfortunately, I don't own Kingdom Hearts, or this would be the real deal.

* * *

Twelve days before Christmas Axel had to leave for Vancouver.

* * *

The air was too clean and the sounds were too hollow. The airport was too pristine and the people were too neat. They stuck out too much. Axel, him with his insane red hair and him, with his stupid yellow jacket that Axel insisted on buying for him because it _looked cute_. Yet Roxas didn't object any further then that, and pretended to act like it was nothing when he hid his smile.

He was going to miss that.

The big time seemed like a major break for Axel, something that he had always wanted to do; had always wanted to accomplish. Roxas wanted what was best for Axel, always, but he didn't know that meant _leaving_ either.

The floor was a safe haven, that way he didn't have too look the red head in the eyes and admit defeat. He didn't want to admit that Axel was leaving, and he probably wasn't going to come back, because he was finally going to _make _something of himself, and once that happened people tend to forget about their past.

"Ah, come on Rox, don't look so sad. I could never forget about the gang." Axel was generally a happy person but his words didn't sound convincing. It wasn't fair, he thought. Roxas was happy, well as happy as a hormonal teenager could be. It was winter and Roxas was hoping to finally get into the twitter-pated state that Namine always talked about. He wanted that with Axel because he _liked_ him but the Canadian had to be good at _softball_ that fucking--

"You're gonna glare a hole into the floor," Fuck was he that obvious?

Roxas looked up at Axel. He remembered when he had first gotten the letter; Roxas was in his house, was in his _room_ and he had only gone outside to check the mail. Roxas could see it all through the window. The look on his face, the rise of his chest, and then the smile that made Roxas wonder what was going on. And then he had to _show_ him. And if only Roxas had at least tried to stop him maybe they could be playing softball at that second, trying to teach everyone how to catch a fly ball.

But they weren't, and Axel was going to leave for mother-fucking Vancouver to play in the big leagues.

Behind Axel was the gate. Roxas knew if the red read went past that his last look of Axel would be of his back, and it wouldn't have been fair-- it just wasn't _fair_.

"Hey, if you don't want to say anything fine with me, but this flight has got to have me on it."

The red head's fingers started twitching, causing the blond to raise his eyebrow. Though Axel was never one to actually feel uncomfortable Roxas reached out and touched his arm. Axel let out a sigh of relief, reached down, took his companions hand, and rubbed the top of it with his thumb, the motion seeming too intimate for such a public place.

"Would it totally be corny if I said I think I might love you?"

"Yes, yes it would," He allowed a small smile to go across his face. Why did Axel have to leave in the first place? It was coming up on winter vacation and how could he even practice his pitching and batting in the harsh snows of _Vancouver?_ The mother fucker were probably going to make him freeze.

Axel, who had actually very much liked his relationship with Roxas as of thus far, had had a hard time figuring out what he wanted to do. Roxas, his mother, his friends, they all told him that he should take the chance, and besides, he had signed up for the exchange program way before he had met Roxas, or at least a few days before he met Roxas.

It wasn't fair that, just because Roxas was bitching, that he had to change his entire career path. Shit really did hit the fan, hadn't it? And for some odd reason Axel sort of found himself blaming the small blond in front of him. Though of course he would never say any of that to Roxas' face.

So the small blond, the one that was sure he kind of liked Axel in that really gay way that he knew he shouldn't have, decided that he would let Axel go because he sort of adored him like that.

Roxas, who had only lived in Canada for a total of 135 days, was irritated by the sudden oncoming development. So what if Axel didn't celebrate Christmas, that didn't mean that it was dismissible for Roxas. It was important, and his... _boyfriend_ leaving was sort of a really pissy thing. If there was a God he was surely laughing at Roxas and taunting him because the message that Roxas got was "_Fuck you Roxas, and a Merry Christmas_,"

He remembered the few days before the letter, the few days where him and Axel were all gay and sweet. He remembered when they went Christmas shopping; fucking _Christmas shopping_. It was almost like the world was pissing on him.

"I have to go,"

Yes, yes of course he had to go, he had to leave Roxas all alone for the holiday's with his parents and with nobody to talk about how commercial the colour red was, then mock the one with red hair because he was the personification of the glitter of commercialism. How fucking ironic was that?

"Yeah, yeah I know,"

"I know you know,"

Which was true. He was reiterating for the fact of reiterating. If Roxas had a nickel for every time he had thought about punching Axel in the face for doing something stupid... Well he would have a lot of nickels. Maybe, just maybe if Roxas wounded back his fist and knocked the red head right out, he could drag him back to the car and make him eat the fruit cake Demyx had made. And they would be _happy_.

_"Last call for flight 201. Last call for flight 201"_

The slight tilt of Axel's head and Roxas could see the column of this throat. The one he had kissed and held in his hands. The one that his lips had traveled and searched to find all the sweet spots to make Axel moan like a whore. God he was acting like a girl.

Axel's head turned back to Roxas, his eyes nervous and his hands stuffed into his pockets. "Goodbye Roxas Bell,"

"Goodbye Axel Chevalier,"

He leaned down and kissed Roxas's cheek and then connected their foreheads, feeling the familiar warmth.

"I love you,"

_Crack_.

What was that?

"Merry Christmas Axel,"

The smile on the pompous mans face shinned and Roxas felt something in his throat lodge. The red head turned his back and walked off through the gate, leaving the cynical teen by his self in the middle of the bustling crowd of the airport.

Roxas turned around and walked out into the blistering air of Montreal, the streets covered in snow, and his body temperature dropping dramatically within a few seconds of being outside. The car, Roxas thought, the car was warm, safe, secure... had tinted windows.

Which was good, because when Roxas got out onto the road the last thing he wanted was for anybody to see him crying.

* * *

10 days before Christmas Axel sent a post card.

* * *

Roxas relieved it with the utmost perplexity. Who, in today's day and age, sent a post card when the internet was faster, and more reliable? It seemed this kind of stuff did not apply for Axel. Even he thought it was old fashion -that's what it said on the card- but he liked it that way.

Demyx turned the card every which way, laying on the couch of Roxas's living room to see the light shine on the picture on the post card. Which was of a bridge. A rinky, dinky bridge that was actually really stupid in Roxas's eyes.

"Cute card. Hey, you think that," Demyx started making hand gestures; large sweeps of his hands that looked like he was trying to spell something, "Maybe, just maybe, that he'll be back for Christmas? I mean, I know he's Jewish but it would make sense right? He has a reason to celebrate it this year,"

Roxas stopped his current actions and thought about that. Axel would celebrate Christmas for him? Why now wouldn't that be a real cluster fuck of emotions.

"Right, like he would waste his time to come back here where it's below freezing, when he could have all the B.C. hotties," During his rant Roxas had started to shove a carrot into a juice, yelling and forgetting that the orange food was praying for its life. Poor vegetable never had a chance.

Demyx, who had watched the massacre of the carrot stared at Roxas like he was a confirmed psycho. Well in his mind he was confirmed to be clinically insane.

"He didn't forget about us Roxas. He wants to do what he loves,"

"Yeah, he sure did _do_ me alright," A cucumber that the young blond had been holding was then relentlessly murdered Sweeney Todd style.

* * *

Demyx and Roxas decided to take a walk while it wasn't snowing so hard, because in Montreal it really sucked in the winter. They saw a movie, the one with the blue people that are nine feet tall?

Whatever, all Roxas knew was that his joints were sore, his toes and fingers were numb, and his feet were soaking from the snow.

Fuck Christmas, he thought.

* * *

Five days before Christmas a friend came to visit.

* * *

Roxas woke up with more or less like there was something on his chest. Now he thought that maybe this could have something to do with the fact that he was a teenager and by all means that means that he was emotional and had some serious hormonal things going on. His thought process was thus interrupted when he opened his eyes to see that, _holy shit_, there was actually someone _sitting on his chest_.

The offended visitor was about a little taller then Roxas, with an affinity to cold weather, or maybe that could have been his rock of a heart. Either way, he was still an ass.

"Wake up fucker, I drove all the way up here to see you,"

Riku, one of Roxas's best friends from Trenton, was one of those guys that you never forget. This could be because he's hotter then the seven layers of hell, or the fact that he's the only guy with long hair that wears it good without looking like a greaser.

Many facts could be attributed to Riku. One fact that Roxas was unaware of was why he was even in Montreal, with little to no notice.

"You haven't been emailing me you douche. What's going on?"

IF Riku could get off Roxas's chest maybe he could tell him, but sitting on his chest, his legs crossed like he was sitting down with the Queen of England, didn't help with his lack of air.

Roxas pushed Riku off and flipped him the bird, a smile on his despite the fact that he could have passed out from lack of oxygen. Riku, who simply flipped his own bird, smiled too, happy to see his somewhat sane friend again.

"So what's going on?"

* * *

"Total FML man, total FML,"

Roxas head that was hung low rose to look at Riku. He was leaning back onto his tangled sheets, his face looking bored, and his body language saying no different.

"FML? Who the hell says that? What, trying to sound cool by using abbreviations? Get your head in the game man..."

"Oh what, I can't say FML but you can quote an HSM song?"

"_What_ is with you and abbreviations?!"

A certain mother walked into the room at that very moment, luckily stopping an eventual struggle that could have ruined a certain teenagers room, and a mother and father would then have to spend their extra cash from their lustrous jobs to fix it. They didn't want to do that, they wanted to buy that new car they had their eye on. Respectively of course.

"Boys, I hope you know that breakfast is almost done. Riku, how long will you be staying here with us?"

As quick as a flash, Riku was smiling like a gentlemen, fixing himself up and standing straight, his voice even and his words eloquent and practically _perfect_. Riku was a fucking monster, Roxas knew it.

* * *

Three days before Christmas Roxas was invited to a joyous celebration.

* * *

Xigbar was a good guy, his 'tude was nice, he was respectful, and he really didn't mind people staring at his eye patch, because that just gave him a reason to talk about it. He made up elaborate tails of his dreadful encounter in the African rain forest, when in reality, all that happened was that he got a baseball to the eye. It never healed, but he sort of liked the eye patch. It gave him a reason to talk like a pirate.

Xigbar, who was the host of the party, was glad that Roxas had brought a friend with him. Everyone, and that included the _team_ -Larxene, Demyx, Xigbar, and Roxas, minus the leader- knew that the blond was a little down thanks to a certain ass of a red head leaving before Christmas.

Down a street, past a park, and to the left would be Xigbar's apartment building. Considering that Roxas had seen Xigbar in the softball diamond most of the time, he slightly wondered what Xigbar's occupation was. He was well off it seemed, and the part of town was pretty nice too.

Riku, who really didn't even know any of the people he was even associating with, had taken a liking to Demyx. The joyous faux-hawk wearing teen had also taken a liking to Riku, and were chatting on the black leather couch when Roxas came up to them, looking like he was a form of angry and depressed.

Demyx, who had seen this look only once before, had dubbed it the "Aggression" look. Which was _supposed _to be a mash-up of the two words.

"Roxas, WTF is wrong with you?"

Everything, he wanted to say. He wasn't in the Christmas spirit, and he didn't want to be holly or jolly. Axel was probably boning some busty blond and getting drunk off Canadian whiskey while playing hockey. That was their national sport right? Or was it Lacrosse?

Either way, the blond knew that he was being a downer, but it was hard not to be. It was all so fake. Everything seemed like it was some cliché scenario of a Christmas movie. Axel wouldn't have made it like that. He would be making everything fun and make Roxas laugh, even if he didn't want to.

"He misses Axel. See that look? Wait, no. _That_ one. He totally misses Axel,"

The glare directed at Demyx didn't make him falter, which it really should have any other day. He was getting weaker. Was he pathetic or what? Just because some guy leaves he becomes a blabbering idiot? What was the meaning in _that_?

Riku's eyes, which were usually bored looking, seemed to become sad when looking at Roxas. He was sort of pathetic looking.

"If you miss your boyfriend so much why don't you call him?"

Whatever was coming out of Riku's mouth, went into his head and became rattled in with the other shit he had been dealing with. Roxas could find so many reasons to _not _call Axel. It was late there, he was probably doing something, sleeping? Having sex? Did their relationship even _end_? It wasn't really all that clear to the blond.

Thoughts were clanging around in Roxas's head, and Demyx and Riku could practically hear it. The thoughts banging against his skull and making the blond stand there, making him look like an idiot.

---

Demyx drove Riku and Roxas home. Roxas, who later realized that the punch was spiked while in the mist of a hazy euphoria, had taken the time to think about _relationships_ and things like _love_ and how it never really worked. Stuff like that didn't exist. Not really. Hollywood could be sued for all the false advertisements they gave out. All those happy couples on the diamond commercials were fake and hurtful to real couples.

Riku, who was slightly older then Roxas, took advantage of the 19-years-of-age limit for drinking, and relished in the fact that his date of birth had only been a weeks before. Demyx, in all his faux-hawk glory, had become the designated driver.

When the two boys got home, they waved off their friend and stumbled into the house. They hushed each other snickered at the idea of keeping quiet, like it was a game and whoever made more noise would lose.

Tripping over themselves until finally in Roxas's room, Riku took hold of Roxas's shoulders and planted a kiss on his lips.

Few things entered the blonds head at that moment. The only thing he could think of was that he sort of liked the feeling of lips, but couldn't understand why they tasted like whiskey instead of the usual warm bread and cinnamon.

* * *

Two days before Christmas Roxas realized something

* * *

Waking up was something Roxas did not look forward too. But, as it were, it had to happen some time, and it did. The affirmed blond was in his bed, sharing it with his otherwise unconscious best friend.

Considering that Roxas didn't really have that big of a bed in the first place, the space between him and Riku was obviously not enough. He could feel his breath on his face, and it smelled _rank_. Riku's long arms were wrapped around him like he was a child and Roxas was the teddy bear. Then something came to Roxas from a show he had watched way back when.

He leaned into the arms then quickly spun back out. Finally free Roxas ran to the bathroom and turned on the shower and scrubbed himself clean.

When he got back out Riku was sitting on the end of his bed with his arms crossed, looking more serious than usual.

"Last night never happened," Whatever Riku said was law, and Roxas was willing to abide.

* * *

Downstairs, his mother was doing the normal house-wife thing and making breakfast. Luckily it wasn't snowing but it was still cold, and the snow on the ground provided good incentive to stay home all day, well, to anyone that was smart.

Roxas, who had been enjoying his Cap'n Crunch stared at Riku from the corner of his eyes, who casually sipped his coffee and chewed his toast.

He wished that he could forget about _that_. His stupid mistake that he let go on for too long. God, what was he _thinking?!_ To let Riku kiss him? And to continue it? God, the Canadian atmosphere must have made him an _idiot_.

But Riku, Riku was the one that started it. The stupid little... game. They had been friends all their lives, and now _what the fuck is going on?!_

"Roxas honey! Phone!" Glad to be able to get out of range from Riku for whatever reason, Roxas leaped out of his seat and grabbed the phone and kept going until he was in the laundry room.

_"Hey Rox?"_ Something in Roxas's chest stopped.

"Axel?"

His mouth suddenly became dry and his hands trembled, and for some odd reason his vision was getting blurry. Odd, it must have been the smell, yeah, too much fabric softener.

_"Hey Rox, how you doin'?" _The idea of saying "Horrible" crossed his mind but he was speaking before he could conform some kind of truth.

"Great, great. Xigbar had a party the other night,"

_"Ha, heard about that. Apparently you didn't know the punch was spiked," _

"Ha-ha, yeah, you should have seen me,"

_"I wish I could have," _

If there was one awkward phone call to have, this call was certainly it. The idea was on both of their minds. It was as plain as day and because they both happened to share a Y chromosome, it was just that much harder to say. Men and their stubborn-ness.

_"I met the couch, she's pretty cool" _Axel, bless his heart, was trying to revive the conversation. But at the mention of "she" Roxas started going into panic mode. _He hates me, he's found someone else and he hates me. He knows that I kissed Riku and now he's going to go sleep with the population of Vancouver_.

The tiled ground below him was starting to become interesting. The difference in the colour of his socks to the colour of the bleached floor was staggering. The idea of bleach made him blush and clutch the receiver even harder.

"T-that's cool. Met any friends?"

_"Now how could I make any friends when they don't even compare to the ones I have back home?" _

Roxas wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve. His teeth were clenched and he breathed slowly to try and keep his breathing even and not to stutter. It just wasn't _fair_. Why was he making it so much harder when he knew that he missed him so much? Roxas decided it sucked to be in love.

* * *

The night before Christmas Roxas received a gift.

* * *

Red's and green's covered his living room, and while Larxene, Riku, Demyx, Xigbar, and a few more working class people that his parents knew were chatting about, Roxas sat at the island table in the kitchen. He stared at the bustle of the crowd in the living room and while he stared at the assorted trinkets and colourful foods, he slowly let his head fall onto the table top.

Even his kitchen had been thrown up on by the commercialism of Christmas. How many trips had his mother gone to Stupid-store before she was completely satisfied with the de-sanctifying of their humble home? And how many times had he had to suffer throw his mother trying to figure out what colour was better, _cherry or rose?_ He really didn't give a rats ass.

Larxene, who was enjoying a champagne with one of his father's golf buddies, waved them off and walked into the kitchen while reaching into her small black purse. She pulled out a sleek black phone. Her black cocktail dress looking fairly flattering on her. Roxas would probably compliment her if he wasn't in such a bad mood.

"Salute! How is it that you are doing?"

The way that Larxene kept glancing from her hands to Roxas made him raise his brow. What was so interesting about him?

"Ah, oui, oui... Non-non-non, ze temperature is four-twenty. Oui, oui... oh of course. He iz right here. Uh, second monsieur? Right." Larxene covered the phone with her hand, the red nail polish shining in the dim light of the kitchen.

"Roxas, ze phone iz for you hm?" Confusion flooded his face as Larxene handed off the phone to him. The smile on her face made him cringe back slightly, wondering what horror could be on the other side of the woman's cell.

Roxas leaned in slowly, his eyes closed and his ear slightly away from the phone, just to make sure that no loud noise would suddenly make him deaf, "Hello?"

_"Roxas! Hey! Merry Christmas!"_

Holy shit,

"Axel? Don't you have some kind of... of spectacular Canadian party to go to?" The teens voice sounded strained, like he was about to cry, but the idea made Roxas shudder. No way, not in front of everyone.

_"Believe me, I'm not missing much," _Axel was smiling through the phone, he could feel it, which only made Roxas smile.

_"So, I was thinking. I don't really celebrate Christmas right? Well, I know it's an important holiday. And like any important holiday, you celebrate it with the ones you love. Well since I couldn't be there, I just wanted to tell you I bought you a present. Should be arriving soon,"_

Roxas felt himself wiping his face periodically every time Axel talked. The chatting and the holly jolly music that was playing from the living room was really hindering the process of talking with the red head, and not only that but Roxas's obnoxious door bell had to go off right when Axel was about to say something.

"Roxas honey, can you get that?" His mother's head pooped out from behind the wall from the kitchen into the living room. The blond nodded and hoped off the chair, leaving Larxene to fix her make-up or whatever it was that she was doing with her mirror.

_"Say, Rox, are you alright? I mean, I've been told that you've been pretty down lately. Anything I can do to fix that?"_

"Ha! Yeah, I'm so sure that you can help. Yeah, don't worry about it you idiot, I'll manage,"

The doorbell rang again and Roxas swore,

_"What's wrong?"_

"Just some ass hole that wont stop ringing my door bell. Probably some fucking carolers. I am _so_ going to get my nerf gun,"

_"Oh for sure. Nerf those fuckers for me, will yeah?"_

Roxas smiled and opened the door. The cellphone in his hand dropped to the floor and his mouth hung open.

"What? I told you you'd get your present soon, didn't I?"

The chatting behind them quieted down and it felt like the world was staring at them. Axel, the Axel that left for Vancouver not even two weeks ago, was there, standing in front of him. His quirky smile and his way-gay pink shirt that he had bought, he was _there_.

Roxas felt himself tear up.

"You're fucking _here_. Why- How?"

"I left a few hours ago, I mean, it _is_ Christmas after all," The hands in the pockets were so trade-mark Axel that Roxas almost wanted to touch him, just to make sure he was real.

Wasn't it a six hour flight? Was this a spur of the moment kind of thing, or did Axel purposely torture, him knowing that he would be back to make a big entrance that would be another trade-mark?

Shaking his blond locks and rubbing his temples soothingly, Roxas groaned out loud, laughing like he was about to go crazy.

"But _why_?! Why did you leave? You fucking _love_ softball, why wouldn't you want to do that? This was your big chance to be a star! You could have become a professional athlete Axel! Why were you so fucking _stupid_!?" With each word Roxas was closer to Axel. By the time his rant had ended he was leaning on Axel, hitting his chest. Roxas stepped back, punching Axel in the arm.

"What the fuck were you thinking you idiot?!"

Axel, the happy go lucky guy of the century, became serious and stern, the look on his face rivaling Riku's almost. The music behind them had stopped by now, and Roxas didn't want to turn around to see who was watching. He breathed in slowly. It was only him and Axel. Only him and Axel.

"I was thinking that I love you,"

Just like that. Just plain English, no extra syllables. Simple. Axel loved Roxas.

"I love you more than I love being a softball sensation,"

His throat felt dry and he suddenly noticed how cold it was, thanks to the open door. He always thought that when Axel said he loved him he was teasing. Roxas, in all his eighteen years of life, felt like the biggest douchebag in the world.

Eyes wide and his hands clammy, Roxas reached up to hold Axel's face, and let his thumb stroke the small tattoos on his cheeks. Roxas had missed those too green eyes.

The blond pulled down the red head and they kissed slowly, their lips melding together softly and warming up Roxas's body quickly. A small cheer came from behind them.

When they pulled apart Roxas leaned onto Axel's forehead, "I love you too, you idiot," Their lips melded again and the cheers from behind them were louder.

The viewing party, which consisted of Riku, Demyx, Xigbar, and Larxene, all silently under-fived each other. This all went unnoticed to Axel and Roxas who continued to mesh their tongues together like it was the last day of their life.

When they pulled apart once again Roxas kissed both of Axel's eye lids, a smile on his lips, and told himself--

"It's good to be in love."

* * *

Damn right.


End file.
